Defining Self-love Biblically: From Matthew 22

What is Self-love?

In Scripture, self-love is a God-given responsibility to care for the body, mind, and soul as His image-bearers.

Biblical self-love reflects stewardship of one’s life, rooted in God’s command to love neighbors as oneself (Matthew 22:39). Jesus’ teaching assumes a healthy self-love that enables self-respect and the capacity to love others. It is not self-centeredness but a recognition of one’s inherent worth as a creation of God.

This differs from selfishness, which prioritizes personal gain over others’ well-being. Self-love, by contrast, aligns with God’s design for mutual flourishing, balancing self-care with responsibility toward the community.

Self-love in the Context of the Greatest Commandment

Matthew 22:39 establishes self-love as a foundational standard for ethical relationships, positioning it as both a divine mandate and a practical benchmark for loving others.

Jesus’ teaching, 'Love your neighbor as yourself,' assumes that self-love is a neutral or positive baseline—a natural starting point for ethical behavior. Scholars debate whether this verse presumes self-love as an inherent human capacity (neutral) or a divinely ordained value (positive). Some argue that self-love here reflects a pragmatic recognition of human self-preservation, while others see it as an affirmation of God’s image in the self, which must be honored to properly love others. This tension highlights the complexity of grounding moral relationships in a concept that can be distorted by selfishness or elevated to a sacred duty.

By framing neighborly love in terms of self-love, Jesus redirects ethical priorities toward mutual care rather than self-centeredness. This command invites believers to cultivate a balanced self-regard that fuels compassion, while the next section will explore how stewardship of one’s life reflects this equilibrium in practice.

Balancing Self-love with Humility

Paul’s exhortation in Philippians 2:3-4 offers a theological framework for reconciling self-love with humility.

In Philippians 2:3-4, Paul writes, *'Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others,'* emphasizing that true self-love avoids pride by prioritizing the well-being of others. This passage reveals a tension: while Scripture affirms the value of self-love as stewardship of God’s creation, it also warns against self-centeredness that elevates the self above communal responsibility. Healthy self-love, therefore, requires a humility that recognizes one’s worth without inflating it into arrogance.

Excessive self-love risks devolving into pride, which Scripture consistently identifies as a root of moral and relational breakdown. By calling believers to 'look to the interests of others,' Paul redirects self-love toward a posture of service, ensuring it aligns with the self-giving love modeled by Christ. This balance of self-regard and service forms the foundation for the next section’s exploration of stewardship in daily life.

Why Self-love Matters Today

In a world where self-centeredness is often mistaken for self-care, biblical self-love provides a vital framework for modern believers navigating mental health, relationships, and spiritual growth.

Healthy self-love fosters resilience in mental health by honoring the body as God’s temple (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), while preventing the distortions of cultural narcissism that prioritize self-aggrandizement over mutual care. In relationships, it enables believers to love others as Jesus commanded (Matthew 22:39), avoiding the pitfalls of self-neglect or exploitation. Spiritually, it cultivates gratitude for God’s image within, fueling a self-discipline that aligns with His purposes (Colossians 3:17).

Practically, cultivating self-love involves prayerful self-reflection, boundary-setting rooted in Scripture, and accountability to guard against pride. This balanced self-regard prepares believers to explore stewardship of their lives as an act of worship in the next section.

Going Deeper

To deepen understanding of self-love, consider related biblical themes like self-care, identity in Christ, and ethical self-preservation.

1 Corinthians 13 emphasizes love’s selfless nature, while Galatians 5:13-14 calls believers to serve others in humility, illustrating how self-love aligns with communal well-being when rooted in Christ’s example.