Chapter Summary
Core Passages from Proverbs 5
Proverbs 5:3-4For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil, but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.
These verses capture the core warning of the chapter, showing how temptation's sweet promises mask a painful and deadly reality.Proverbs 5:18Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth.
This verse shifts from warning to celebration, highlighting that God's plan for marriage is not one of restriction but of joyful, blessed intimacy.Proverbs 5:21-22For a man's ways are before the eyes of the Lord, and he ponders all his paths. The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin.
This serves as the ultimate reason for choosing wisdom: God is always watching, and sin is a self-destructive trap that no one escapes on their own.
Historical & Cultural Context
A Father's Urgent Plea for Wisdom
The chapter opens with the intimate tone of a father speaking directly to his son. This isn't a public lecture but a personal, urgent appeal to embrace wisdom for the sake of self-preservation. The father knows that the greatest threats often come in the most attractive packages. He sets the stage by contrasting his life-giving wisdom with the deadly allure of the 'forbidden woman,' a figure representing sexual temptation in its most dangerous form.
The Two Paths: Ruin or Rejoicing
After painting a grim picture of the consequences of infidelity - loss of honor, wealth, health, and life itself - the scene shifts dramatically. The focus moves from what to avoid to what to embrace. Using beautiful, life-affirming imagery of wells and fountains, the father celebrates the joy, satisfaction, and blessing found in marital faithfulness. The chapter concludes by reminding the son that this choice is not made in a vacuum. God Himself observes every path, and the natural outcome of folly is self-destruction.
A Guide to Navigating Desire and Devotion
Proverbs 5 unfolds as a powerful and poetic lesson on sexual ethics, framed as a father's loving guidance. The chapter begins by exposing the deceptive nature of illicit desire, then graphically details its ruinous consequences. It pivots to a beautiful celebration of marital love before concluding with a solemn reminder that all of life is lived before the eyes of God, and our choices determine our destiny.
The Sweet Poison of Temptation (Proverbs 5:1-6)
1 My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding,
2 that you may keep discretion, and your lips may guard knowledge.
3 For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil,
4 but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.
5 Her feet go down to death; her steps follow the path to Sheol;
6 She does not ponder the path of life; her ways wander, and she does not know it.
Commentary:
Temptation appears sweet and harmless, but its true nature is bitter, destructive, and leads to death.
The High Cost of Folly (Proverbs 5:7-14)
7 And now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth.
8 Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house,
9 lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless,
10 lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner,
11 And at the end of your life you groan, when your flesh and body are consumed,
12 and you say, "How I hated discipline, and my heart despised reproof!
13 I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors.
14 I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation.”
Commentary:
Giving in to sexual temptation leads to the loss of everything valuable - honor, wealth, health, and time - and ends in bitter regret.
The Joy of Your Own Well (Proverbs 5:15-20)
15 Drink water from your own cistern, flowing water from your own well.
16 Should your springs be scattered abroad, streams of water in the streets?
17 Let them be for yourself alone, and not for strangers with you.
18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth.
19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
20 Why should you be intoxicated, my son, with a forbidden woman and embrace the bosom of an adulteress?
Commentary:
Find deep joy and life-giving satisfaction by remaining devoted to your spouse, which is God's design for blessed intimacy.
The All-Seeing Judge (Proverbs 5:21-23)
21 For a man's ways are before the eyes of the Lord, and he ponders all his paths.
22 The iniquities of the wicked ensnare him, and he is held fast in the cords of his sin.
23 He dies for lack of discipline, and because of his great folly he is led astray.
Commentary:
God sees every choice you make, and a life of sin will ultimately ensnare and destroy you through your own foolishness.
Core Truths on Love, Lust, and Life
The Deception of Sin
Proverbs 5 teaches that sin's greatest weapon is deception. It presents itself as attractive, pleasurable, and harmless ('lips drip honey'), while hiding its true nature, which is bitter, destructive, and deadly ('bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword'). Wisdom is the ability to see past the initial allure to the ultimate consequence.
The Sanctity and Joy of Marriage
This chapter passionately celebrates the goodness of marriage, rather than simply condemning adultery. It portrays marital intimacy as a 'fountain' of blessing and a source of deep, intoxicating joy. God's commands are not meant to restrict human happiness but to channel it toward true, lasting, and exclusive fulfillment.
The Inevitability of Consequences
A central theme is that choices have unavoidable results. The chapter makes it clear that infidelity leads to a cascade of losses - reputation, resources, health, and eventually life itself. Sin is presented as a self-destructive force that traps a person in the 'cords of his sin,' leading to ruin by their own folly.
Divine Accountability
The final verses remind us that we live our lives 'before the eyes of the Lord.' This truth provides the ultimate motivation for righteousness. Knowing that a loving and just God sees and weighs all our paths encourages us to live with integrity, even in secret, and reminds us that no sin goes unnoticed.
Applying Ancient Wisdom to Modern Life
In a culture that often portrays sex as a casual act with no consequences, Proverbs 5 stands in stark contrast. It teaches that sexuality is powerful and that misusing it leads to severe damage (Proverbs 5:9-11). The chapter calls you to see sex not as a recreational activity, but as a sacred bond designed for the exclusive, joyful context of marriage (Proverbs 5:18-19).
This verse advises proactive avoidance, not passive resistance. Practically, this means setting clear boundaries in your relationships and with media, avoiding situations that you know are tempting, and being accountable to a trusted friend or mentor. It also means actively investing in your marriage, so that you are 'intoxicated' with the love you already have, rather than looking for it elsewhere.
This beautiful metaphor is a principle for contentment, not merely about marriage. It encourages you to find joy and satisfaction in the blessings God has already provided in your life, rather than constantly craving what others have. Whether in your relationships, career, or possessions, wisdom teaches you to cultivate and appreciate your 'own well' instead of being tempted by the fleeting streams of the world.
Choose the Path to Life
Proverbs 5 reveals that biblical wisdom is intensely practical, especially in the vital area of sexuality. God's instructions are not arbitrary rules but loving guardrails designed to protect us from self-destruction. The message is that true, lasting joy is found not in chasing forbidden passions, but in cherishing the beautiful gifts God provides, especially the covenant of marriage. Our choices matter because our Creator is watching, and He desires for us to walk in paths that lead to life, not death.
What This Means for Us Today
Proverbs 5 extends an invitation to choose between two futures: one of fleeting pleasure followed by deep regret, and one of faithful love that leads to lasting joy. It calls us to be wise enough to see past the immediate appeal of temptation and to actively cultivate the blessings we have been given. This is an invitation to invest in a love that is life-giving and God-honoring.
- In what area of your life do you need to 'drink water from your own cistern' and find contentment in God's provision?
- What practical boundaries can you set up to 'keep your way far' from temptation?
- How can you better celebrate and rejoice in the good relationships God has placed in your life?
Further Reading
Immediate Context
This chapter sets the stage by urging the reader to value and pursue wisdom above all else, preparing them for the specific application of that wisdom in chapter 5.
The theme continues with further warnings against adultery (Proverbs 6:20-35), reinforcing the destructive consequences outlined in chapter 5.
Connections Across Scripture
Joseph's refusal of Potiphar's wife provides a powerful narrative example of someone who 'keeps his way far from' sexual temptation out of faithfulness to God.
Paul echoes the urgency of Proverbs, commanding believers to 'flee from sexual immorality' because our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit.
This book serves as the positive counterpart to the warnings in Proverbs 5, celebrating the passion, beauty, and exclusivity of marital love.
Discussion Questions
- Proverbs 5:3 describes temptation's words as 'smoother than oil.' In what modern ways does temptation present itself as smooth, appealing, and harmless?
- The chapter contrasts the destructive path of adultery (v. 9-14) with the joyful path of marriage (v. 15-19). Why is it important to focus on celebrating the good and beautiful, rather than only warning against the bad?
- Verse 21 says that a man's ways are 'before the eyes of the Lord.' How might truly believing this change the way you approach private decisions and temptations?